Scene 2

After the first party I drove about 1 hour to the venue of the next party. It was located just outside the city and in the home of the 'founder' of the group. There were about 20 - 30 guys there. It was around 1am in the morning when I got there and most were already... well, some of their inhibitions were gone because of the drinking - but nothing scandalous :)

In 5 minutes I was introduced to everyone there so i didn't really remember anyone hehehe. Some were dancing, some were singing at the karaoke machine, couples and those who hooked up that night were cuddling.

Enlarging my social circle was my real purpose, although there were 1 or 2 guys there who could have distracted me from that ;) It wasn't exactly my 'group' but i think i managed to fit in as best as i could.

I had a great time, although I couldn't help but feel just a bit envious of the couples who were there.

Merry Christmas

I pray that we all still have that child inside us
because only children can see the magic that is Christmas.

Maligayang Pasko!

(Merry Christmas!)

Merry Christmas

I pray that we all still have that child inside us
because only children can see the magic that is Christmas.

Maligayang Pasko!

(Merry Christmas!)

What Matters Most

My heart goes out to my blogger friend Mark. I know how it feels when a love has to end. You have the memories. Hang in there.

It's not how long we held each other's hand
What matters is how well we loved each other
It's not how far we travelled on our way
Of what we found to say
It's not the spring you see, but all the shades of green

It's not how long I held you in my arms
What matters is how sweet the years together
It's not how many summertimes we had to give to fall
The early morning smiles we tearfully recall
What matters most is that we loved at all.

It's not how many summertimes we had to give to fall
The early morning smiles we tearfully recall
What matters most is that we loved at all.

What matters most is that we loved at all.

Hints & Clues

Sometime between grade school and highschool I got a bit sexually aware... there was health magazines for men... and porn, which i enjoyed ONLY if there was a guy in the scene. Fantasies always included guys too...

It should have been obvious.

I didn't get it :)

A Denied Need

I was chatting on the IRC where more often than not people like me log on to hook up with others. A chatter mentioned that he was looking for people who were depressed to chat with. That piqued my interest and I sent him a private message.

He said that last chirstmas he was depressed, heartbroken and hopeless but he said he learned a lot this past year and though he was still single now he was happy and he wanted to share what he learned with others.

I chatted with him because this was a 'first' for me to find someone with this reason for going into this particular chatroom.

........
<Rygel> i don't know what i'm looking for
<hangad> whats wrong
<hangad> really
<hangad> and certainly
<hangad> there's emptiness within right?
<Rygel> there's always that
<Rygel> but it's more of something's lacking
<hangad> i see
<hangad> spiritually how are oyu?
<Rygel> am ok spiritually
<hangad> really
<hangad> thats cool
<hangad> :)
<Rygel> it's not emptiness, its more of lack of fulfilment i guess... not really sure what it is
<hangad> i see
<hangad> you dont have to be sad
<hangad> and indulge in
<Rygel> i'm not even sad... that's the problem... i don't know what i feel
<hangad> oh
<Rygel> i'd say it's more of indifference
<hangad> that suprised me ah

Then he went on to say that the reason I was... well... bothered was because I contained my feelings and didn't share them with others. I disagreed that I needed someone to talk to...

<hangad> are u open to ur feelings
<hangad> i mean
<hangad> do you talk about it
<Rygel> i'd be happier (ironically) if i was sad or angry
<hangad> with some friend
<Rygel> no one to talk to
<hangad> awww
<hangad> that explains it
<Rygel> close friends don't know that i'm well, not straight... and people like me are too busy with their personal lives
<hangad> you really need to have that someone who'll listen to you
<Rygel> explains what?
<Rygel> hehehe... that's a short time solution
<hangad> kase
<hangad> no,its not
<hangad> listen
<Rygel> i'll be better siguro for about 4 hours then back to the same feelings
<hangad> i mean, leading a life like ours is complicated in the first place
<Rygel> but talking about it won't change anything
<hangad> feeling mo lang yun
<Rygel> i know it
<Rygel> :)
<Rygel> its just the same as being able to shout at the top of your voice
<hangad> its hard to contain feelings and not being able to express it
<Rygel> it's a big relief but very short lived
<Rygel> the problem with me ata is that i don't know what i'm feeling
No such nick/channel

He got cut off suddenly... Suddenly I felt sssoooo angry and mad at him that I wanted to shout at the monitor, "Come back here!!!"

He was right - I needed someone to talk with, to share what I felt and what I was going through. He was right - I was keeping all the negative emotions inside that it was eating away at me. He was right. I needed to let it out... only, there's no one here for me to talk to.

In Defense of Superficiality

A lot of people say that we shouldn't judge others by the way they look or fall for someone just by his or her looks.

I say:

While it's true that looks won't carry a relationship far beyond the 'honeymoon' period, a relationship won't even start without physical attraction.

Before the ears hear, before the nose smells, before the fingers touch, and before the brain is stimulated, the eyes have already seen and decided.

When you look at the person you love while he or she is sleeping beside you and you think to yourself, "I'm love him/her so much"...  the point is you're looking - not talking, not touching, not brainstorming - just looking...

...and falling.

In Defense of Superficiality

A lot of people say that we shouldn't judge others by the way they look or fall for someone just by his or her looks.

I say:

While it's true that looks won't carry a relationship far beyond the 'honeymoon' period, a relationship won't even start without physical attraction.

Before the ears hear, before the nose smells, before the fingers touch, and before the brain is stimulated, the eyes have already seen and decided.

When you look at the person you love while he or she is sleeping beside you and you think to yourself, "I'm love him/her so much"...  the point is you're looking - not talking, not touching, not brainstorming - just looking...

...and falling.

Scene 1

There were actually 2 gatherings I went to and I was overdressed for both :) Both were Eye Ball Parties for groups I recently joined.

The gathering place for the 1st one was a Starbucks cafe inside a local mall. Unlike in the US, Starbucks outlets here are usually places where fashionistas (and wannabees) hang out instead of just a simple place to drink coffee. People actually think that being seen at a Starbucks cafe would make them look 'cool' and trendy.

I knew it wouldn't be a good idea to meet up there - I was right. I don't really understand why people think it's cool to act snobbish and indifferent.

I tried a new approach though - i smiled (a lot), shook hands (instead of just nodding) when introduced, and made physical (appropriately) and eye contact.

i don't think they knew what to make of me.

It wasn't exactly a great party. Most were trying to appear 'cool' by being distant and uninterested. It was really dragging and I was relieved to leave by 11:30pm.

Things I noticed:

1. The anorexic look was "in"
2. I was a lot more mature and confident
3. I like Madonna's songs :)
4. I can pretend that i'm having a great time

On to Scene 2...

Back to the Scene

I wish I was straight!... hahaha... well, I actually do... hmmm.... no I don't... uhhh... I'm attending a party of sorts in an attempt to rescue my social life from the brink of extinction.

I can't remember that last time I've gone out to meet new people. I'm not exactly an outgoing, sociable creature... I'm more of a wallflower at parties, except I desperately want the attention but not stupid enough to wear a butt hugging, latex costume and 'meow' just to get it (some people there actually do that).

Dammit! I'm tense! and I'm not even going there in the hope of hooking up with someone - which is the reason 99% of the people are attending - I just need to expand my social circle and feed my ego.

I envy guys who look good in just about anything or nothing at all (hehehe). "The clothes make the man" they say, well, if that's true I'll need a lot more clothes to cover me up.

I still have to make sure my hair stays in place, my face isn't shining (oiliness IS next to ugliness), my teeth are perfectly white, my breath is fresh, I smell good, nails are clean, and clothes (oh please let there be a miracle) flatter me and make me look at lot better than I see myself in the mirror.

I seem to have lost my sense of humor! Wits, don't fail me now.

Dang! I wish I was straight! (NOT!)

Best Friend / First Love ?!?

We weren't in the same circle of friends...

We weren't even in the same section...

We didn't talk because we didn't have anything to talk about...

I didn't know anything about him except his name...

... and one day, in the 3rd grade, I just decided that he was my best friend. I found ways to know him better and to spend time with him (although not alone). We became friends... well, at least acquaintances - but I was happy - He was my best friend.

Just seeing him made me happy. We didn't talk about serious things, in fact we didn't have a conversation like what usually goes on between good friends. But he was my best friend.

He transferred to another place after grade school. I missed him. I kept in touch, snail mail, and even visited as often as I could for the next 2 years.

Now that I look back... I was happy just seeing him; happier being with him (in a group of friends)... I must have, as much as is possible for a kid of that age, been in love with him.

I'm so clueless!

The Earth Patrol

The last destination in my birthday celebration was the sea lion show. It was pretty simple but enjoyable. The aim was to promote caring for the environment hence the name "The Earth Patrol"

Beginnings

I guess I already was different from the start. Whether it was because of something in my DNA or some event in childhood, I really do not know.

In grade school, I was a goody-two-shoes nerdy kid. My parents taught me about good values and I was a very good student. I studied hard, went to church regularly, memorized my memory verses, went straight home after classes... etc., etc. I wasn't exposed to the 'outside' world. Television programs were regulated (my dad really hates soap operas). The only thing I knew about the 3rd sex was that they were those boys who acted like girls and were often the subject of jokes and teasing. I, definitely, wasn't one of them.

I wasn't into sports. I guess it was because we didn't have easy access to sports facilities in my neighborhood. My parents also seemed to prioritize other talents such as playing the piano, public speaking, singing and the like (I don't blame them).

Psychology says that during the grade school years, boys hang out with boys and girls with girls, and they hate the other sex. However I recall that I was more often in the company of my girl classmates - maybe because I didn't like playing basketball, or sipa (local game).

And one more thing - I don't really recall but a former classmate pointed it out to me when I was already in college - It turns out that even if I wasn't really a sociable kid, I always had a 'buddy' - A classmate with whom I always went with, sat beside in the classroom, had recess with... and that 'buddy' was always a guy.

Were these hints of who I was? Maybe, but at that time it seemed perfectly normal.

Intersections & Detours

Life is full of intersections and detours  and sometimes it's only by looking back that we can point out exactly when that wrong turn took place or when you correctly chose the right direction. I now realize some things - some were choices, some were events, some were people - that would determine what I am now.

It would be easy to feel regret over somethings I have done but the truth is, it was impossible at that time to determine which was the right thing to do.

Would life be better if I could predict how a certain decision would affect my life? Like if I stayed home on a particular night instead of going out or if I logged on to the Net at this hour instead of that...

I've had my share of intersections, detours and sometimes dead ends. We don't have the benefit of having a bird's-eye-view of the road/s ahead. I guess that's the reality of living - not knowing where we will end up but still hoping for the best just the same (and making the best of what we end up with).

Intersections & Detours

Life is full of intersections and detours  and sometimes it's only by looking back that we can point out exactly when that wrong turn took place or when you correctly chose the right direction. I now realize some things - some were choices, some were events, some were people - that would determine what I am now.

It would be easy to feel regret over somethings I have done but the truth is, it was impossible at that time to determine which was the right thing to do.

Would life be better if I could predict how a certain decision would affect my life? Like if I stayed home on a particular night instead of going out or if I logged on to the Net at this hour instead of that...

I've had my share of intersections, detours and sometimes dead ends. We don't have the benefit of having a bird's-eye-view of the road/s ahead. I guess that's the reality of living - not knowing where we will end up but still hoping for the best just the same (and making the best of what we end up with).

Coming Out Clean

My life isn't bad. I come from a middle class family. We are not rich but my parents managed to provide for everything I need and some things I want. I have a good educational background and had just recently obtained a degree in the medical field.

I'm gay (No, I don't feel like I'm a girl or am a female trapped in a man's body. I'm a guy (and I like being one). It's just that I simply fall (in love or lust) after other guys).

There I've said it! I should have said it when I started blogging last year. It would have been such a relief to be able to tell the world (at least the part that doesn't know me until now) about the REAL me. I started to blog because I saw it as a way to be free from all pretentions. But during that first year of blogging, before I knew it, I turned my blogging world into a replica of my real world - where I had to watch every word I wrote instead of being able to just pour myself out.

It's time to set things straight (well you know what I mean).

This is my story...

Tickled Anticipation

I'm not very ticklish but I've always wondered why it's impossible to to tickle myself. It seems that i'm not the only one - Some scientists have tried to explain the reason why.

Apparently when we tickle ourselves, our body tries to prepare for it and succeeds most of the time because the action is predictable [True Tickle Takes Another's Touch].

But somehow knowing that another person is going to tickle me doesn't help :)

 

Yesterday Ended Last Night

I received this SMS message the other day:

 

"Yesterday Ended Last Night"

 

It reminded me that no matter how bad my day was, it already is a part of the past and it shouldn't keep me from doing my best.

At the same time, I realized that it also means that I shouldn't let any accomplishments I made during the day get into my head, because, like the failures, they are also already a part of the past

As Good As It Gets

"Some have great stories, pretty stories that take place at lakes with boats and friends and noodle salad. Just, no one in this car. But, a lot of people, that's their story. Good times, noodle salad. What makes it so hard is not that you had it bad, but that you're that pissed that so many others had it good."

Melvin Udall (Jack Nicholson)

This is one of the best movies I'v seen. I caught it again on HBO this week and I felt the same - mixed emotions. CONTENTMENT is the message of the movie. It's only human to want something better than what we already have and this usually leads to discontent. It should be under the genre "horror - comedy" because it frightens me to think that what I have now might be 'as good as it gets!"

Casino Royale

Starring: agent K800i
Co-starring: agent M600i
Special Appearance: Daniel Craig
The ONLY hi-tech gadget in the film:
Waterproof Makeup! (oooohhhhh!!!)

Inactivity

If my blog doesn't get updated for quite a while it means that everything is fine. It's either I'm busy or i have absolutely nothing to do - either way it means i'm bored with my daily routine or nothing is happening and again, i'm bored. Stress actually seems like a good thing right now. Have a great day :)

Too Late!

After spending 5 more post college years in medschool, I find this advice! - and i'm not even earning a "high" pay! (This window would have been smashed if I had a stone in my hand :) )

Lest We Forget

I can't believe it's been 5 years since the Towers went down. I remember watching the 2nd plane hit the tower live on CNN... it seems just like a few months ago. I pray the pain is easier for those who lost their loved ones that day.

1-Year Old Professional

It's been just a bit more than a year since I received a license to practice my profession. I wish I could feel some success, but i don't really feel anything has changed. I wish time wouldn't pass by so fast while I chart my course.

Utopia

It's far from the best film i've seen - The Beach - but it's one of those films that made me stop and think.


Imagine waking up to clear blue skies and sparkling clear water every morning. No need to rush to work, no deadlines to beat, no bills to pay... We may not all be looking for the perfect beach but I think we all want to escape these things, we all secretly wish we could just leave all our responsibilities behind and not look back. WHAT IF the opportunity actually came -would you take it? WOULD YOU BE HAPPIER?

Connect the Dots

US boys hooked on gospel, techno and pop are more at risk of HIV infection than devotees of other musical styles, including "bling, bling" hip hop, according to a new study.

Musical tastes may offer clues to rates of HIV infection, said researchers who tried to decipher the complex behaviors and attitudes of young men in the United States, at a global AIDS conference.

...They found boys who listened to hip hop music were more likely to have vaginal intercourse and had more partners, but boys from church or New York club scenes (techno, pop, electronic) took the most sexual risks. (Yahoo! News)

Sometimes I think we should get rid of Statistics. It can make connections between anything you can think of.

Letting Go...

I've often heard the statement "If you really love someone, you have to let him/her go..." I think this is a form of 'sweet lemoning' coz when he/she wants to leave (the relationship), nothing you can do can stop that person from going away. Don't fool yourself into believing that you can make him/her stay.

If you LOVE YOURSELF, you should let go.

Cry Baby

These are the only 2 movies i know that always bring tears to my eyes no matter how many times i (accidentally) get to watch them - Little Women & Stepmom.

It's only now that i realize some similarities:

1. Both star Susan Sarandon
2. Both are about relationships with moms
3. Both have memorable scenes during christmas time
4. Both are generally about females

I'm such a crybaby :)


Are there movies that move you, too?

Sukob

I'm a fan of thriller/suspense films but i'm the type who keeps his fingers over his eyes througout the film :) But when it comes to locally produced movies (which you have to drag me to watch) i usually spend the whole screening time critizing the bad acting, bad makeup, bad sound effects and ridiculous story.


The movie "Sukob" turned out to be a nice surprise. For once, I actually got 'thrilled' a couple of times while watching a locally made movie - and the acting and story wasn't bad at all and i can't recall hearing the sound effects typical of past horror movies I've seen. The movie is about a Filipino belief that getting married less than a year after the death OR marriage of an immediate family member would bring bad luck. "Sukob" is the curse on the newly weds.

I think the story is quite original (which is RARE for a local film) and i thought the "ghost" in the movie was original too until it got tired of being original and did a "Sadako" (from the Japanese movie 'Ring) entrance. Oh, well, at least that was towards the end of the movie. Been quite a while since I enjoyed a proudly Philippine made movie (last one was Tanging Ina).

PS: I slept with the lights turned on last night ... i wonder how i'll do tonight hahaha!

Simply Bored

It's one of those rare weekends when i'm actually free to do anything i want since i'm not on duty - and i can't think of anything to do! I've been complaining to myself for the past few weeks that i'm always busy and i need some time off and here i am doing nothing, getting tired of looking for something to do.

i can't have a simple life. It's too boring.

... of Superheroes

I recently saw Superman Returns on the big screen and i couldn't help asking myself questions about these superheroes:

1. Why are Superman and Spiderman's alter-egoes such loosers?
2. In the animated series Justice League, Wonder Woman can fly - so why does she need an invisible jet?
3. How does Superman get a haircut? (normal scissors won't work)
4. Why is Batman considered a superhero?
5. What's the secret of Clark Kent's eyeglasses?
6. Which superhero has the most active sex life (if any)?

... i'll think of some more

Time of Death . . .

It was bound to happen sooner or later - I'm both relieved and anxious that it happened this way: Around 1:30AM i was in dreamland when i woke up to the sound of our doorbell ringing. I ignored it for about 15 minutes (my room's the one nearest the front door) but when it didn't stop, i had to get up. It was a fellow church member from a nearby house. Her mother had been suffering from lung cancer and had slowly been deteriorating that they decided that it was best that she pass away in her home with her loved ones around her - well, it finally happened. All they needed was for a doctor to declare that she had indeed passed away.

We walked to their home, i knew what i was supposed to do but i was a bit apprehensive. Her body was already cold, no breathing, no hearbeat, no pulse, no blood pressure, pupils dilated .... time of death 2:08AM.

I got home around 2:30AM i couldn't sleep. I know it sounds stupid but i was really afraid that i might have missed out on some sign of life. I was afraid that once the morgue got to the body they would discover that she was just in a comatose state... i was worried about my reputation (which i was just starting to build).

The fact that someone losed a loved one was the last thing on my mind. I actually feel guilty that i couldn't empathize with them

Doctor's Fee: Pay $50

On which should a doctor base his fee?
	SEVERITY of the disease
	LENGTH of stay / treatment of the disease
	Whether the patient IMPROVES or not
	the doctor's level of EXPERTISE
	the patient's FINANCIAL status
	OTHERS (pls specify in comment section)
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Doctors & Guns

FACTS:
1. The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000
2. Accidental deaths caused by physcians per year are: 120,000
3. Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171
(statistics courtesy of the U.S. Dept. of Health Human Services)

* * * * * * *

Guns:
1. The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000
2. The number of accidental gun deaths per year is 1,500
3. the number of accidental deaths per gun owner is 0.000188
(statistics courtesy of FBI)

* * * * * * *

So statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners

* * * * * * *

Remember, "Guns don't kill people, doctors do."

* * * * * * *

FACT: Not everyone has a gun,
but almost everyone has AT LEAST one doctor.

* * * * * * *

Please alert your friends to this alarming threat.
We must ban doctors before this gets completely our of hand!!!

* * * * * * *

Out of concern for the public at large,
I have withheld the statistics on lawyers
for fear the shock would case
people to panic and seek medical attention.

No Comment!

I can't seem to be able to post my comments in Blogger, Haloscan, and Typepad. Has there been a ban on commenting that i don't know of?

The Meltdown

I enjoyed this movie more than the first.
Sid should do standup comedy and Scat should get to star in His own movie :)

Heat at Work

There are times when everthing that can go wrong does. Since February stepped in, the working environment in Dr. D's clinic has been increasingly tense. Small mistakes, in my opinion, have been blown out of proportion. Every member of the staff is trying hard not to make a mistake but it seems that the more they try, the harder it is to do things right. The best intentions are not recognized as such. I think it would be healthy for everyone to have 2 days off to let off steam but closing the clinic even just for 2 days would be out of the question.

The weather is hot and humid and that doesn't make things easier *sigh*

Team Player

I've never been a team player. I've hated group activities since I was in grade school. Somehow people always expect me to lead but I don't know how to be a leader. I usually know what to do when i work alone but I don't have the patience to wait for others to do their part. I just found out that you don't have to be in a group to be affected by others. I hate people who take their sweet time and do not even realize that other's are on 'pause' waiting for them to make their move!

The Heat is On!

I usually joke that we have only 2 seasons here in the Philippines - hot and VERY hot! Well, it seems that the very hot season is already here. I don't mind the sun if it's packaged with white sand and cool breezes and cold mango shakes :) but when it comes with pollution and dust and traffic I'd rather have rain. Oh well, it's better than thunderstorms.

Have a great summer season guys!

Do You Know Where You're Going?

Ever had a song keep playing on and on and on and on and on . . . in your head? Here's the one that has been playing in mine for a long time:

Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? do you know?
Do you get what you're hoping for?
When you look behind you there's no open door
What are you hoping for?
Do you know?

Once we were standing still in time
Chasing the fantasies that filled our minds
You knew i loved you, but my spirit was free
Laughing at the question that you once ask me

Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? do you know?

Now, looking back in all we pass
We've let so many dreams just slip through our hands
Why must we wait so long before we see
How sad the answers to those questions can be?

Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you?
Where are you going to? do you know?
Do you get what you're hoping for?
When you look behind you there's no open door
What are you hoping for? do you know?

Impending Death...

... of my PC

About 1 month ago, my PC started having trouble booting up and there were also problems with the display. I changed the video card and power supply. Everything went smoothly for about 1 month.

The other day, I came home from duty and the computer refused to boot up. No harddisk activity, no flicker on the monitor... no nothing! I couldn't blog!!!

Just a few minutes ago, i decided to take out 1 memory chip and well... the computer started up with 256MB less of memory. I hope that that was the problem. I guess I have to face it... my PC, after 3 years of faithful service, is about to leave us. Whaaa!!! Just thinking about all the program installations and program updates (Dialup!!!) I have to go through again brings tears to my eyes.

The Amazing Idol

Americal Idol & The Amazing Race - these are 2 of reality series I watch regularly. Whom do you want to win in this season's Idol? I just watched the 10 female finalists perform. It seems that the younger finalists will be tough to beat. However I wish Simon's prediction the Brenna Gethers won't make it to the next round comes true. I don't think she'll make a good star.

As for The Amazing Race, I'm glad the family edition is through. Too much bickering among the teams got irritating. I wish one of the elderly teams gets very lucky and manages to outsmart their younger competitors. They are always at an disadvantage.

Brokeback Mountain

This movie isn't for everyone. In fact, most people won't be able to get over the fact that 2 guys, especially cowboys are going at it. I watched this movie a week ago since it was the only Oscar nominee (as far as I know) for best picture that was being shown in cinemas locally. Of course there were the collective gasps especially during the 1st 30 minutes or so of the movie and the nervous laughs of the movie goers while walking out of the cinemas. But a week after, it sank in. The fact that I'm even blogging about it means it made an impression.

I think the movie is about the different ways to be 'in love' and I think that it was necessary for it have homosexual (whether male or female) lead characters. Why? To have a common baseline (both men) because women are from Venus, and men from Mars - and in a heterosexual love (like Romeo & Juliet; Titanic) story the focus is usually on the 'story' and not on the 'love'part.

I don't know why but it seems like a big deal to me to answer the question: "Who (Ennis or Jack) was honestly in love? Not once did either say, "I love you."

Was it Jack (played by Gyllenhaal) who was more affectionate, more vocal, drove 14 hours one-way just to get together, included Ennis in his future plans and dreams and waited 20 years in vain, admitted that sex was important to him and admitted that he had casual sex because their 'get togethers' where far and few in between, and eventually included someone else in his future plans?

Or

Was it Ennis (played by Ledger) who, never in the film voiced his feelings for Jack but broke down when they went separate ways for the first time and made a surprising move when they met again after 4 years, seemed perfectly content with getting together once in a while and refused Jack's offer to stay together, who was unable to maintain a 'double'life, reacted violently then emotionally when he got the idea that Jack might have been seeing others?

It seemed to me that Jack was in love with the 'idea'of being in love. And Ennis, well, I can't understand him at all.

Watch the movie, wait a week or more, then tell me what you think.

Boracay: Back to Civilization

It has taken me quite a while to post this. My 4-day stay in Boracay came to an end too soon. I was travelling on a tight budget so I decided to take a ship home instead of going by plane. I hesistantly boarded the bus for the pier (a local fruid - rambutan - was being sold nearby):


After a 5-hour trip, what I think is the WORST photo of my trip came into view - I was back! Whaaaaa!



Next: The St. Joseph

Sick Leave... Not!

There are 3 of us doctors rotating on 24-hour duty at Dr. Ds Clinic. Unfortunately, 1 had to go on leave for this month. I'm on 24-hr duty every 2 days and it isn't a good time get sick. Unfortunately, viruses aren't very considerate. While on duty yesterday, I developed what i diagnose to be intestinal flu - fever, vomiting, diarrhea. Its hard to keep up appearances while receiving patients.

Just the smell or sight of food made me nauseaous. Somehow i made it through the 24-hr period but i decided that i had to have intravenous fluids since i didn't have appetite. Once i got home this morning i asked my mom (also a doctor) to stick an IV line so i could get hydrated.

I'm typing this post with just my left hand so please pardon any misspelt words =) and yes, I have to go on 24-hr duty tomorrow because there are just the 2 of us alternating.

Guys, Its Not Your Fault! But...

I guess many guys out there can breath a sigh of relief. They can stop taking it as a personal failure when they can't 'perform' because it's not their fault... but then again, maybe they should worry all the more because:

Erectile Dysfunction Can Signal Heart Trouble

I guess I should be expecting a lot of worried male patients at the ER :)

Facials

Tension, stress and lack of sleep while preparing for the Board Exams last August resulted in unnatural outbreaks of pimples on my face. Eventually I was persuaded to have my first, much needed facial. I made a mental note that somehow i would undergo the procedure regularly - i didn't. But i forgot why.

The past 2 weeks of being on duty at Dr D's clinic was unusally busy and i often had just an hour of sleep everytime. As expected, the pimples came back. A few days ago, i found myself having my second facial - now i remember why i didn't have it more often - OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!

Tales From Enchanted Kingdom

I wasn't really able to enjoy the holiday season because I was frequently on duty at Dr. D's clinic. Fortunately on the 1st week of January I had some free time and I decided to treat myself to Enchanted Kingdom.

Enchanted Kingdom is the first theme park in the Philippines. It's located in Sta. Rosa Laguna, about 2 hours from Metro Manila. For 500 pesos ($10) you get to enjoy most of the rides for a whole day.


I wish I had more such days!


They say that a hearty laugh is a great stress reliever - well, so is a good scream! hehehe

A great way to fight the heat!


The most nerve-wrecking ride of all - The Kiddy Train! Imagine lining up with all those noisy kids and fighting over who gets to ring the train bell! hahaha!

PS: On the ride Rio Grande Rapids, there are signs that say, "Expect to get wet on this ride." - This is an understatement! Expect to get soaked!

PS PS: Don't skip the 4D Theater! you'll have to pay 40 pesos but it's worth finding out what the 4th D is!

Is This New to You?

I'm still having a drought of topics to post about. I have 3 blogs and it was still 2005 when i last posted in 2 of them. I've been scanning health headlines recently and maybe its just me but some of the recent findings researchers have reported don't seem to be worth the money and effort just to prove something... but that's the trend - Evidence based Medicine. Here are some of those headlines:

Alcohol ads boost drinking among young: study --> why do you think they make ads?

Cheerleaders run high risk of injury: study --> Would getting rid of the pompoms help?

Women who cut dietary fat lose weight: study --> isn't decreasing fat intake a 'must' in dieting

Children with asthma often miss school --> I wonder why!

Heavy, poorly positioned backpacks hard on kids --> Must have took them a long time to find out

and the most useless headline (not health related):

Microsoft warns of critical Windows security flaws --> HAHAHAHAHA!!!

NO, I didn't read the contents :)

Up or Down?

What is God's Will?

A neighbor, after months of applying, is finally leaving to work in another country. She'll earn about 15X more than she currently earns here. Her husband will be in charge of taking care of their kids. But this past week, things became more complicated - Her husband was diagnosed with a malignancy.

Although the extra income would mean that her husband would get better treatment, it would also mean that she won't be around to provide emotional support and help care for the kids if ever chemotherapy would cause side effects of if the treatment would fail.

What would you advise her to do? What do you think God's will is in this case?

Fireworks, Firecrackers and the Economy

It has always been part of Philippine tradition to welcome the New Year with firecrackers (those noisy things that explode on the ground and some fireworks (those things that explode in the sky).

When I was a kid it was almost impossible to go out on New Year's Eve as early as 7pm because of the many firecrackers going on (unless you wanted to risk having 1 less finger on your hand) and would end around 2AM of the New Year. As years flew by i noticed that the noise of firecrackers started later in the evening. By New Year's Eve 2001 the noise of firecrackers started becoming noticeable only around 10pm and would end at 1AM.

2004 was the quietest (in terms of firecracker noise). It was already 11:30pm when the celebrations could be heard and around 12:15am it was aready quiet.

It was a surprise for me this past New Year that around 9pm celebrations were already underway. Plus there were a lot more fireworks now than the previous years. Things quieted down around 1AM.

This could only mean 1 of 2 things:

1. Despite the political turmoil, natural disasters, and increasing gap between the rich and poor - 2005 wasn't that bad; or

2. it really was a bad year and the people were so glad that the year was done that they just had to celebrate!

Whatever the reason, Happy New Year, Philippines!!!