Tuesday, November 6, 2007

I Love the Way You Loved Me

You may never read this.

You were everything I always hoped for but never thought I'd find. You made me feel safe, protected, & loved. You gave me flowers. No matter how stubborn I was, you stepped back and remained patient with me. I know I was pushing your limits but you denied yourself the satisfaction of putting me in my proper place. You gave me flowers. You made me blush.

Why am I not fighting to keep you from going? I honestly don't know. It's not a question of love. If it was, then things would be a lot simpler. I've been looking deep inside trying to find out what's wrong but nothing makes sense.

Look at our big fights - they happened during those times when I should have been supportive and at your side. Instead, I added to your troubles. I'm starting to realize that I'm selfish, wanting everything to be about "me". I'd like to think that that's the reason I'm not putting up a fight. I'd like to think that I want you to be with someone a lot more deserving of your attention.

Part of me is hoping that you won't try to patch things up and let things be. Maybe the problem is that I don't really know what I want.

Maybe if you read this, you'll try to get back together. Think things through - why would you want to do that? We both know that I'm not as big a loss to you as you are to me. Many would disagree but we both know its true. You have so much more to offer the person you love.

Maybe if you read this, you'll wish we never met. Maybe that would be best.

There are others who'll love me or would want the chance to love me. Maybe they'll love me more than you ever did. But, no one can express love the way you did.

You may never read this.

The reason for this post, I don't know. I don't know how to end it either. You gave me flowers.

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