Growth Spurt

There are 2 normal growth spurts in humans while growing up - the 1st is during the toddler years and the 2nd is during puberty. Both are associated with clumpsiness, ackwardness, insecurities, and finally adjustment and acceptance - which can be accepted or forced.

I feel as if my growing as an individual has been in growth spurts instead of being gradual and step by step. And like physical growth spurts I have had to deal with the same difficulties each and everytime.

This 2010, whether I like it or not, will have to be another such growth spurt. I already am wishing that it be done and over with. Hoping that I end up going forward and not back.

Fail

"my life has no direction, no purpose, no aim, no meaning, and yet I'm happy. I can't figure out what I'm doing right." - Charles Shulz

up to the word "meaning", I feel exactly the same way. I feel I'm a failure to myself, my parents, my friends... mostly everyone. The persons I don't think I've failed don't make me feel appreciated, so I guess that's another failure in judgment

I have no idea what to do next. Wish I could just get away. But then that would make me a bigger failure.

How I wish I know what direction to go. Even just a point in the right direction would help.